Another Woody allen classic
Boris: And you, Sonja, you look more beautiful standing here than you do in person.
Boris: There’s been a mistake! I know, I made it!
Boris: Something’s missing.
Boris: I don’t know, I feel a void at the center of my being.
Doctor: What kind of void?
Boris: Well… an empty void.
Doctor: An empty void?
Boris: Yes. I felt a full void about a month ago but it was just something I ate.
Russian gentleman: Your skin, it is so beautiful!
Sonja: Yes, I know. It covers my whole body.
Boris: The question is: have I learned anything about life? Only that… only that human beings are divided into mind and body. The mind embraces all the nobler aspirations, like poetry and philosophy, but the body has all the fun. The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there IS a God, I don’t think that He’s evil. I think that the worst you can say about Him is that, basically, He’s an underachiever. After all, you know, there are worse things in life than death. I mean, if you’ve ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman, you know exactly what I mean. The key here, I think, is to… to not think of death as an end, but think of it more as a very effective way of cutting down on your expenses. Regarding love, heh, you know, what can you say? It’s not the quantity of your sexual relations that count. It’s the quality. On the other hand, if the quantity drops below once every eight months, I would definitely look into it. Well, that’s about it for me folks. Goodbye.